Ahhhhhhhhhhhh, the Caribbean Sea. The golden beaches of Runaway Bay. The sound of gentle waves lapping the shore, with reggae notes from the steel band softly echoing in the warm sun. The views... of azure waters, sun-fish sailboats, couples walking hand in hand down the glorious stretch of sugar-soft sand, and... NAKED TUSHES EVERYWHERE?
Yup, you have arrived at Hedonism III, SuperClubs Resorts' latest entry in the "be wicked for a week" market.
At least, that's the verbiage from the brochure of Hedonism II
, the first Hedo, located in Negril (there is no Hedonism I) but the brochure for Hedonism III is much more explicit. "Quaint Victorian architecture and soft pastels conceal a sinister soul, like a black teddy under a housecoat,
" the brochure proclaims. "We suggest you try everything once, and the really bad things as often as you can
With a come-on that seductive, how does a resort with a reputation to uphold celebrate that most romantic of holidays, Valentines' Day? Why, with a mass nude wedding and renewal of vows, of course.
Zein Nakash, the company's Vice President of Marketing and Environmental Affairs, claims that SuperClubs is "the Cupid of the Caribbean," and as such, this resort wants to make a wedding day as memorable as possible for any couple. For the second year in a row the resort is "baring it all, literally," as the couples and their guests enjoy the ceremony au naturel.
Every year, SuperClubs assists in the weddings of thousands of couples, with its "Free Weddings" program, included in a stay of three nights or more. Ceremonies range from the traditional, romantic wedding at the shore as the sun sets, or in the gardens surrounded by lush flora, to the zaniness of being wed on a trapeze, or atop a sandcastle wedding cake. Nothing, however, comes close to this year's venture at Hedonism III, where all the guests of the resort are invited to partake in the buff.
A few years ago, my daughter and I had dinner at Hedo II. We were surprised at the rowdy
debauchery, but we had a wonderful time. Of course, on that particular occasion, we were observers rather than participants. I can just imagine what an actual stay at the resort would be like; the pure definition of "get away from it all." Hedonism is a place where you shed your inhibitions along with your clothing, and anything goes. In fact, it's encouraged.
What other resort puts out a calendar of bodacious hunks?
And yet, and yet...
If you're gonna do it, if you're going to be wicked for a week, the Hedonism resorts allow you to do it in style.
Hedonism III is located in Runaway Bay, not too far from Ocho Rios, on 15 acres of prime beachfront.
The resort offers 225 rooms with a variety of views, air-conditioning, and twin or king beds. It also has a series of deluxe "swim-up" rooms surrounding one of the resort's pools. Hedonism is one of the few resorts where a single traveler can be paired with another single of the same sex to allow sharing of accommodation.
As with all of SuperClubs resorts, Hedonism III is a SuperInclusive property, which means that your tariff includes: Accommodations; all meals, SuperSnacks and unlimited premium brand drinks; all land and water sports, with instruction and equipment; the exclusive Circus Workshop; recreational activities; entertainment; weddings (with a minimum 3 night stay); airport transfers; hotel taxes; no tipping allowed.
The resort has four restaurants, pool grills, and SuperClubs' unique "Snack Attack" packs available 24 hours a day. Entertainment options include several theme nights, five bars, a discotheque, live bands, performers, floor shows and Karaoke.
Both land and water-based recreation is plentiful, with four freshwater pools including one set aside for those choosing the au naturel lifestyle, complimentary use of all non-motorized water toys, a fully equipped fitness center, tennis courts and clinics, volleyball, and nearby golf available for an additional fee. A four-story tube waterslide and the special Circus Workshop help make this resort one of a kind.
Admit it, even if you don't want to witness a mass nude wedding or participate in the exchanging of vows, the thought of learning to fly through the air on a trapeze must be very appealing. And if it isn't, the beach, the food, the entertainment, the pools, the views, and a wee, tiny bit of naughtiness is a panacea for life in the 21st century.